Clouds

                                                                                   Google Image

We are living under the clouds
Entering them the world is lost
The map we follow is inside us
And beyond those misty clouds
  Is a blue sky brightened by sun

Anxiety

                                                                            Google Image
Stomachs don’t digest anxiety
So anxiousness wrestles
Nervous in my stomach
Pushing at its walls
Avoiding the dark secret of gut
And its dark, twisting pathways
Anxiety can’t stand alone
It is the shadow of fear

Weather

                                                                                               Google Image

Some days made forgotten days good
Others made dull days bright as new wood
As our life sailed forever on oceans blind
We only experienced the weather we'd find
Whether calm and mild or dark in a storm
Every day was different - each day reborn
Its importance was noted on pages of soul
Watching a truth unveil paths and our role
Toward the narrow point of a longing bowl

Blindside

                                                                                                      Google Image

I never even saw it coming
Maybe I forgot why I am here
Like so many others forget
But it sat me up awake
Losing what was lent to me
To use and share for a lifetime
The gift I chose for all

Really, what I took for granted was life
The most precious and unlikely thing
We could ever encounter in any eternity
Life is a gift that lives beyond all dreams
A foundation for the universe that we see
The best teacher of compassion and peace
It survives the sleep that dissolves our past

Life forgives everything
Except what we carry
In our precious way
Until we change forever
Embracing deeper beliefs
That wait beside our stream
Patient beyond our lifetime

Sunny Periods

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There are clouds everywhere in the sky
All different colors, different sizes, different shapes
I haven’t got a clue what direction they are going in
All I notice is that the sun feels very warm in my car
But it feels too cool when we sit in the shade with the engine turned off
It seems bright and hot and then shady and cool every minute or so
The car windows are going up and down in unison as we crank them
Tulips and daffodils laugh with color but hide in the silence of their buds
There is a stillness in the spring-time gardens as we drive the highway
I enjoy the weather’s demand to be noticed today and the gardens too
It is not that much work to roll the window up and down
The dog is sleeping and my son is sitting beside me
Talking about the hot girls that he met yesterday
As our windows roll up and down together

A Feeling

 

                                                                                      Google Image

I don’t know whether to call you by your name
Or maybe I should just speak straight into God
Were you trying to teach me that love does not exist
Or were you afraid to feel it burning inside of your soul
The situation does not matter;  I know it is real - I felt it
Far inside so I know love is there and it will be there forever
In a part of me that won’t be forced but always seeks to grow
To find a way and a place to be infinite and beyond all edges
Beyond hope, beyond truth, beyond reason, beyond every thing
Love always makes its own rules with compassion for all
Not always with softness and never with pity or spite
Simply what is right and good for all is the best thing for me
Courage is necessary even when it doesn’t seem hard
And felt Love will always be real

Testing

                                                                                            Google Image

I found a rock to toss
It was perfect for testing the mud and the water
The goop that lay ahead
How deep and how soft
How mucky their clutch

I found a stick to probe with
It was perfect for testing the water and the mud
The goop that lay ahead
How deep and how soft
How mucky their clutch

I took a step
And felt the cold water and slid into the mud
Feeling violated again
By this world that looks easy
But bites hard when tested

Then I felt the world’s embrace
From the mother of us all

Deer Trail

                                                                       Oregon Beaked Moss - Google Image


Oregon Beaked Moss softly feathers over black rock
And cradles brittle white patches of Reindeer Lichen
Liverwort crescents trace drip-lines of shore pines
Rising from mossy hollows of the moist green ground
There are only a few species of trees that grow here
Arbutus and shore pine can survive in small hollows
But all the trees here are shallow rooted under moss
Trees can thrive trough winter dampness in this place
But mossy ground will crunch summer dry all around them
And on that dry summer day these trees may just wonder
Why they ever picked this silent place to struggle in

Deer have walked through here I can tell
They have browsed on the few low shrubs
And left smooth round brown droppings
Along the trails that cross the land
Trails that lead away to somewhere else
Trails that lead to here from somewhere else

I can’t say for sure how these trails were made
Or where each of these bare earth ribbons lead
And I have never seen a deer on a trail here
But the deer are here and so are trails
I've just never seen the two together
Not like in my garden below that hill
Where I have watched deer walk both ways
Very early or late in the day’s light
Into and out of our planted garden
Along steep and narrow rock pathways
That cross the hill behind our home
All leading toward the wind-blown sea

                                                                                Reindeer Lichen - Google Image 

Light

                                                                         Google Image


The sun's coming and going
The clouds toing and froing
Both have readied us for change
Showing nothing stays the same

Yesterdays light was a gift to sight
Viewing across the afternoon light
Sparkles bright bounce off the Bay
Soft thin cloud patched in the way

Blown by wind and turned by earth
Trees and mountains shadow dirt
All these things can beat their drum
As sparkles ride and ripples run

Steady wind seemed newly made
Wave-less water filled the Bay
All I watched was dimpled sea
Reflecting sunlight back to me

Shivered light across green sea
Looked transparent in front of me
And sparkled sun bounced my way
No matter where I stood that day

But now the sea seems different
Its bright light is harsh arranged
So squinting tight I turn my back
To shield my eyes with a wool hat

Today the sea is darkly raked
Streaked with foam chased by wake
Ripples on the waves aren't kind
Harsh reflections of sun can blind

Sunlight is always changing
And it makes every day amazing
Although we never peek for fun
Somehow we know it comes from sun

Borrowed

                                                                                         Google Image


The world loves life that lives
Seeds and leaves both borrowed
By all life that lives embodied
In this generous place that gives
Freely bodies and their beauty
Sensing the silence in change
The world expects every bit back
Changed only by its vision

Water Wakes Joyfully

                                                                               Google Image


Pure raindrops given to seas
By streams that carry life
Are precious in their task
And know their beauty well
But surrender to a larger will

Every stream offers beauty
Between rain clouds and seas
To water that it carries
Over the bright surfaces
Of slow yielding rock
Under tall green trees
That love the cool stream
Close beside bright silver fish
Helping the water remember
A moist community of love
The places it came from
The places it will go
As water sings joyfully
The song of its stream

River Flow

                                                                                            Google Image


How deep does the river flow
Is it something like my soul
And often hidden from view
Under ruffled surface flow
Or contaminated by ego
A distorted reflection of self
Why seek reflections at all
Every heart knows the truth
Whenever it feels it, nearby

Windows

                                                                                              Windows Wallpaper


Cleaning windows is hard work
Vinegar and old newspapers
They left the windows bright
But my finger nails look black
And my skin smells of vinegar
Cleaned windows draw my eyes
Expectantly, outside toward
Light and color and movement
All occur to let my mind know
What the other world might be like
But every good window opens up
To let sound and air pass through
Along with the light from outside
Helping us to feel the world
The bigger place that holds us
The one that waits for us

West Coast Winter

                                                                                                                                                  Google Image

The Canadian West Coast Winter has been mild-grey-dreary and wet this past year. The sun looked at us through a blue-bright dry lens yesterday for the first time since summer. We could feel the sun’s warmth during the afternoon. Everything seemed to know that spring is coming. The lawn and the garden the birds and the animals all seem to sense it. I know it is coming too. I made the first cut of my mossy front lawn and walked across its plush clean green - seen softness. Moisture seems to hold in it and the moss is so alive after the moist mild winter that it seems to emit its own soft greenish light. A push-mower catcher full of its fuzzy clippings is so different from June’s coarse-dry-dark-green-bladed crop that I have learned winter is the moss season while late spring and autumn belong to the grasses. Summer is dry and brown for my lawn but the dog sleeps on it softly all year round.

I weeded the gardens last weekend and they look brand new among the green mossy lawns. The plants and trees all seem healthy and seem full of good expectations even the ones that are leafless. I like this time of year – just in front of an inevitable spring that is coming. This is the season when doors and windows begin to open even if they have just been cleaned. Open windows and doors let the music out and the air inside allowing crisp air and love to mingle everywhere. I will wait without thought to send the sweet alder smell of fall and winter up my chimney but I will send blessings for my family when that day arrives. Winter in the woods can be a quiet time of contemplation while spring can invite color and movement back to our world

Body, Mind and Soul

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Some times we need to hold on
Other times we have to let go
The heart is the one that knows
When to hold and when to release
The mind is missing something
To captain the heart and hand

Our still mind is often silent
When our life flows at full bore
Feelings tingle through our body
When our smile finds a generous soul
Mind thinks ~ that seems like love
Feelings know ~ this feels like love

The mind and the body
Must have a lot of courage
Because they both let go
They are the ones that die
After our marriage to life
The mind and the soul
May come to know each other
Before they separate forever

Souls and Minds are so different
Together, they can make music
Or art or poetry or love
Apart, they can become
Ragged enemies to each other
Bound together for a lifetime

Heal your body’s pain
Admire your kind mind
Feed your soul love and wisdom
And fly with your body and mind
Where your soul wants to go
Until death pulls them apart

snow geese arrive

 Google Image

I left late for work today
It was nearly seven AM
The sky beginning to light 
Carried great calls of geese
High in the sky, approaching
I waited for them, watching
Until their great wave arrived
Thousands of snow geese
Flying and calling in a jagged line
Geometric lace stretched
Right and tight across the sky
From one side to the other
The line of captured calls
With out any stragglers
Passed me by high and quickly
Flying fast and straight
Walkers hid under leafy trees
In case they were bombed from above
But these were snow geese - not seagulls
When the line of geese had passed
And it was quiet again
The people left their shelters
And scurried toward their day
Another wave of geese announced its coming
Thousands more came
In a diamond studded weave
That passed over me
A speckled weave of sound
Flying north into the river’s marsh
That waited for them
I have never seen so many birds
And all of my life I have waited

Cormorant

                                                                                Google Image

A black bird rises quickly from the river into the breast of a gentle breeze. Turning tightly downstream, the bird swoops beautifully toward the rounded rippling body of deep water. It is just the bird and me in this full and simply complex world but nothing is missing and there is no room for anything else. The bird was feeding and I am walking neither of us knowing we are blessed in this moment.

I watched the bird carve a long moment from the breeze with its sleek black wings and start a slow assent downstream. Before I could imagine it, the lone cormorant flying fast and low turned to follow a distant bend in the river leaving me alone but filled with tearful feelings that I can’t explain.

Cathedral

                                                         Google Image

Mist settles close under winter’s cool breath
Hushed quiet looks straight through to my soul
Everything is raw and everything is important
Our future is always ready for us to appear
Always greeting us an excited servant of life
In every-way it knows everything is earnest
It reminds us that life rolls-on never sleeping
Then in a moment - just like every other one
Unrehearsed, we are returned home again
To that earlier familiar place of forgetting
That truthful place that we wandered
And the community we never forgot
So let go of the facts learned in school
Hold on to the things you know in your heart
Let life and learning fold back into their dreams
And long for a truth that you really need to know

The Past

 
                                                                                            Google Image
The mist is heavy enough
To silence a green Ocean
As if a wave is waiting
For the wind’s encouragement
To rise and rush at the shore
With an important story
From a far off salty sea
Painting, singing or sculpting
Its own exotic past for us
  On rock or wet sand beaches
Like a star’s light streaming
Across the black night sky
It brings us far lost moments
While we stand alone forgetting
Warm stories from our own rich past

Winter Morning

                                                creative103.com photo

I sat on a cold driver’s seat in darkness
And fit the key in the ignition by feel
The car seemed to think about starting
When I turned its old key fast past run
But the manual choke revved the engine
And promised to warm the car in a while
My cold left hand let go the steering wheel
And buried itself in the warm nest of my legs
I knew it wouldn’t take long to warm up
As the softly frosted windows cleared
For a moment with each spray of fluid
I watched the windshield for progress
It was beautiful,,, a clear playing field
Of mystery and beauty for water and frost
As the sweet warm breath of a childlike God
Was playing across my glistening window
Each bouquet of frost spread out in pans
  Forming quickly in a white magical way
Giving each streetlight six pointed ray
After the engine warmed - no frost survived
What a miracle of water and frost I watched
As if they never heard of the rules
That fashion all the other compounds

One specific example is that water expands when it changes from a liquid to a solid.  This is the opposite of most other compounds which typically shrink in volume as they solidify.  In other words, while other compounds typically increase in density when they 'freeze' - ice density is lowed when it freezes.  This means that ice floats on water and therefore the bottom of lakes remain accessible to aquatic organisms for living and feeding.  Without this unique physical property - life would not exist here on earth as we know it.  Ecological diversity would probably be much lower than it is today (if water dependent life survived at all).  Bottom dwelling aquatic insect species in far northern and far southern aquatic habitats would be most severely affected if ice were to increase in density when it froze.  Sinking ice would likely starve or kill these organisms and stress all the other species that depend on them.

Longings and Wishes

                                                                              Google Image


All you need to do is to notice your love just one time
And you'll always know its there as the world changes
So there is no need to pretend the promise of an other
And if we wish to change an old unsatisfied longing
Like a fish long out of water it will loose its lit colors
As life within it disappears invisibly with its struggle
Until no breath can breathe life back into its dream
Some longings can hide in our past but still reach us
Longings that we wish we never knew or grasped on to
Shiny lives we dreamed when it made good sense to us
But life changes for all of us and we so seldom look back
Time moves and our heads believe we can’t see that way
Minds think the past has been poured and sits forever set
So walk lightly with your wishes and feed them every day
Love them one-day-at-a-time until you stand together
And they grow into you and you grow into them
Until they take you to the place you are already at
Where you can walk forever in your own dreams

Blackened Bark

                                               photo credit Steve Norman
I see the burned tree
Just there above the roots
Was it a lightning strike
Or a grass fire uncontrolled
That marked this tree
I can’t tell by looking
At the ground around
Or at other old trees
Below the winter breeze
As their living tops sway
Beneath the breathing sun
It's an old tree from its size
With a scar near its roots
Much like one I gathered
In my own young innocence
The scar long forgotten
By the tree’s tender tips

Fir Tree

                                   Google Image
Broken branches lie on the ground
They were nipped off by yesterday’s wind
It combed hard through the winter forest
We all stayed away from the forest that day
To let the wind litter its danger from above
When calm returned the wind had done its work
The high forest waved soft and clean and green
In the early light of a quiet morning’s birth
While all the broken branches seemed satisfied
To lie still on the ground around their trees
I think these branches were never alive by themselves
But were the high-up pathways that life traveled within
As it longed to reach the sun, feel the clouds or hear birds
Until the wind broke them off and dropped them to the ground
Their needles still green and fragrant with life’s sweet breath
Summer birds will never notice the missing brittle branches
As they will perch and sing and nest on other branches
And life will find other pathways through its trees to travel
We will also make new pathways to walk along if we need to

Stairway

                               Google Image

Life accommodates us
Until it shocks us down
Deep beneath our floor
Below our own secrets
It speaks from marrow
And no one can ever
Make us feel alright
About a truth that never
Ever belonged to us
The wisest humans
Are a lot like that
A river of truth

River Stone

                                                                                 Google Image
A dark rich rock rests
Alone
Near a shallow swirling sea
Bathed by constant change
Wet with polished pride
Bright beyond belief
Glistening in the sun
Near the river mouth
Sunset smooth with time
Happy in its harvest

The Earth

                                                               Google Image


Is Earth rolling through the sky?
Do distant stars to wishes lie?
Does the sun spin just for fun?
Who will time the human race?

But rain has washed the snow
And left it nowhere else to go
So it chased it down the drain
To feed the rivers and a plain

Now the world just burned again
But the earth still seeks to reign
So change colored by the crow
Flies fast between the trees
Through shadows that we breathe

This world was never perfect
Just good natured and alive
It welcomed life as it arrived
As it struggled to survive

Now we shoulder for our space
As Mother Earth sets the pace
Gentle love with awesome grace
She is authentic and forgives
While she is teaching us to live

The earth we all live on is alive itself as it can signal to those who listen with care and works continually, without seeming to tire, to sustain itself. We do, for the most part, live within the sealed envelope of our atmosphere and share the air and the food and the water that exchanges between all organisms and the planet itself. Just as light travels in all directions to reach us through space our awareness and imagination travels outward at a speed faster than light. This is only one of the many ways in which the whole universe is tied together. Beyond giving thanks for the air and the water and the food that sustains our visit here we need to somehow give thanks and acknowledge life itself that can sculpt an ever-changing presence and awareness with ease.

Winter

                                                 Google Image
It is white and it is cold and it is winter
Much of the world seems to be sleeping
Catching its breath and sleeping well
Before the busy parties of spring arrive
Before the lush growth hides summer
Then after fall’s heavy harvest is stored
The circle returns fully to winter again

I have been here long enough to believe
That spring will come again to the land
Just as it will come to me in its own way
That the lush growth in summertime
And the heavy harvest of my autumn
May be within as much as outside of me
That the vines of my love will reappear
In the light and warmth of springtime soil
Wherever winter’s dreams will take me

Seasons

                                                      Google Image

Cold and
Still Raining
The days are dark
And light comes late
With night starting early
Now my life seems short
Many things have changed
Since I crossed the threshold
Of aging within an older body
Awakening a longing within me
A longing that may just follow me
Across all the invisible borders
Of life and death and age
It could change me
My attitudes
My joy

Winter Window

                      John Eastwood - Stillness and the Winter Sky

Moisture hangs from its grey winter sky
Brown leaves rot relieved on the ground
Sleeping still under winter’s moist blanket
Dreaming up another grand adventure
While ten thousand perfect pearls light
And hang motionless on thin branches
of Japanese Maples and Weeping Birches
Droplets that seem to hold the only light
How do these water droplets gather light?
Crystal drops that feed on flocks of mist
Vibrating weightless in winter’s stillness

Such crisp silence in Winter’s Window
So different from the soft blankets
Of deadening snow – that seem to grow
Flake by flake through winter storms
Covering the world in a deep silence
Making it lean toward white and clean
But Winter’s Window is very different
It is clean but wet and magnifies sound
Until the nameless voice in our thoughts
Or even our own soft whisper sounds loud
Its silence is real – not stolen from the world

For the very first time this year
And in the very last month of it too
True silence has visited and left me
Alone enough to join everything

Destiny

                                                                                            Google Image

Destiny is beautiful and forever
It so often seems to live just beyond
The push of our own retreating horizon
Across the sea of our own blindness
As we hold to our hope like a shining sun
In a daytime sky that is forever bright

When enough days have passed
To know the sun will rise again
And warm an early morning sky
It helps us know the difference
Between Hope of mind and body
And the true Destiny of our soul

We will never reach our destiny
Until we accept that it lives here now
Born out of a past that we walked upon
A past that brought us to where we stand

Destiny is as beautiful as a flower
That awakens from its desert seed
Or the stars that rise from darkness to pulse
Before retreating back to their empty sky
Filled more full than ever before

Our Destiny is Here in this present moment. This precious present moment that we brought ourselves to through all the footsteps of our past. Where we go from here is up to us as we carry our destiny with us – alive and real in every moment. Let my destiny be my song, my painting, my love.

Wholeheartedness

                                                              Google Image


Wholeheartedness is a forest of many trees
A place where we can be both lost and found
Happy lost in light and unafraid in the dark
Breathing bright air washed in perfect pride
There are others in this room full of love
That is full of rich gifts from the other side
We’re blessed to know we belong here at last
Wholeheartedness has ended our exhaustion
Exactly the way the wise man said it would
Our soul carried us beyond where our body tripped

Snow Geese at Night

                                                                       Google Image from Audubon 

I can hear them
But I can’t see them
Snow geese that fly at night
They seem infinite in their numbers
Every night the past month I heard them call
This time when they are elsewhere
I will remember selfless calls
Their perfect V’s
Unseen to those who fly

I will remember
The perfection of their V
Silhouetted above the street lights
Generated by the air that we can not see
Explained by the geese that can only feel
When they are in the right place
Singing with the ecstasy
Of remembering
Their home

           Let
                 Me
                     Live
                           The
                     Way
               They
           Fly

Winter Sea

                                                                                   Google Image

The sea sways full with emotion
As waves topple from tall to speak
Rumbling cold thunders of protest
As they run up the cobble beach
And then draw back into the sea
Where salty water needs to be
For one more chance to speak or see
I wonder what the waves all say
Before their torn by wind into spray
Soft lines of whitecaps from far away
Are fearsome and urgent in salty spray
I wonder if waves just speak for wind
Before it dances with forest trees
And flushes birds like autumn leaves

Snow Geese

                                                                  Google Image

Thousands of snow geese
Renewed by birthing their young
Salt and pepper into winter
Their white and black wings
Excitedly wedging a way
Toward the new place they
Always carried with them
Or did they simply hear
And then trust a voice
That frees them to fly
Into unconditional love
  Into nature's golden promise
Breathless survival for some
Yet simple, pure, joy for others

Belief

                                                                                   Google image
Winter’s chill seems inevitable
It has waited outside my door
Where it has always been visible
White snow high on distant mountains
I always saw it there but never felt it
Until it descended like a river into my valley
And separated me so far from the sun
Let my soul be generous to this powerful visitor
The one who knew me before my journey began
This ancestor of life, whom I honor

Nature's Change

                                                                                     Google image
I am shaken well today
Hungry, for a change
I ate – twice breakfast
The first was so good
The dog is fed as usual
I watched two videos
And helped my computer
To wake through darkness
Man shifted his timepiece
Yesterday
So we start the week in light
Today
The real world found me
Right away this morning
Walking along the river
Autumn leaves sleeping
Over ragged green grass
Changing the ground
Near blue sky now filled
With bare black whips
When did all the yellow
Maple leaves come and
Where did all the green
Cottonwood leaves go
The world seems different
Its daylight is different
A seal swims in the river
The salmon must be here
I am so lucky just to be
Able to notice it happen
As my coffee cools and
An eagle labors upstream
Over-top of swimming seals
And under leaving geese
A jet plane lands unaware
Noisy in the middle of it all
Until the sweet harmony of
Nature's changing song returns

Our DoG

Where is the wet nose
The one that finds me
And makes me think
That dog was waiting
Just for my specialness

Where is that bright dog
That became my friend
And accepted my love
So I wanted to give more
And I didn’t need it back

How can I tell my children
That our friend who shared
So many secret journeys
With them just laid down
And let go his warm body

And how without hands
Or words to open dreams
He taught us about trust
And helped us all to love
Simply, openly and freely

Winter Moisture

                                                                                                Google Image
Winter moisture is always there
To buffer any change that comes
As it locks the doors on darkness
And closes the windows on light
It changes the sound of tires
It changes the brightness of sun
It hides forever the comfort of day
Winter is tied tight to short days
As it sleeps with an angled sun
Its privacy is a gift that is given
Through the goodness of loving hearts
And the smiles of confident courage
As raindrops form before falling
The privacy of clouds generously draped
To cover one million naked bodies
All of them see-through except for
One single solitary speck of dust
Imprisoned but floating in crystal purity
Free in a single water droplet
That waits for our story to unfold
For a destination to reveal itself
Giving freedom to all who hear it
And freedom to all who need it

Wake

                                                                     Google Images
Waves from all the working boats
Are forgotten after finding shore
Leaving no trace behind
I watch them silently
As they approach
Seldom arriving
Along the noisy shore
Before their vessel fades
Around a bend in the river
Leaving no trace of either behind
And their moment passes for ever

Difficult

                                                                     Google Image
A season from elsewhere
Caught me by surprise
As it paused in front of eyes
And greeted me from darkness
Just a nod without surprise

With no malice in its heart
It bumped me from the start
Then perched me on life’s shelf
To listen for my self
Just like I would do
If I were there to choose
Winter’s cold and wet
Or summer hot and dry

But this season is different
Leaves don’t grow or fall
Through this winter met by all
And if I were just a tree
This season would seem to me
One solitary winter
After harvesting a life

It’s just the way I knew
And like the way I drew
But now I am deciding
Where to go from here
Prickly autumn harvest and
Life’s beauty help me steer

Frost

                                                                                        Google Image
Frost's cold fur found my window
The car starts but frost remains
There is nothing to do but wait
The engine will warm and melt the frost
What can I do except sit on a cold seat?
Remembering the freeze of last winter
And then the heat of last summer
And then the heavy rain of last fall
Here I am in the cold, again
Waiting for my engine to warm
And melt these feathers of frost
Isn't the world full of wonder?

Joy

The human mind and soul
Experiencing hollow longing
Echoed through dark halls past
Long ago emptied of people
Warm friends and bright breath
Long departed and long forgotten
As if a chapter were completed
And left to sleep under settling dust

That place was important to us all
That moment knew our joy of living
Lost in our selves yet closer to god
Giving and sharing and blessing
All in the same fullness of a moment
All in the same darkness of knowing
Lit by love and warmed by our hearts
In a time and place important to us all